I Know My Bike…

…is a heap of junk, but there’s no need to rub it in by leaving more junk on top of it. Yes, London’s ‘tidy’ litter louts have been at it again: somehow fooling themselves that it’s not littering if you place your rubbish neatly on something – like a bike – instead of casually tossing it over their shoulder. Frankly, as the owner of the bike in question, I’d prefer the shoulder toss approach. Most days I come out of the station to find my rear rack adorned with a neatly placed freebie paper, which is irritating enough. Yesterday it was a sandwich wrapper complete with half-eaten sandwich. Nice. I pity the poor sod with the bike with the basket – top tip for bike owners: take the basket off the front before parking your bike in the underpass if you don’t want to be emptying out your body weight in rubbish from it every day.

So here’s this week’s dilemma: You are the proud owner of a bike and the reluctant custodian of someone else’s half eaten sandwich. Do you take the sandwich home and throw it away yourself, or do you toss it over your shoulder before cycling into the sunset?

No points for saying you place it neatly on someone else’s bike.


10 responses to “I Know My Bike…

  1. London City Soul™

    ahhhh shoot now, i was just about saying that.

    nil points for me then i guess….

  2. yep. And minus points if you actually did leave it on my bike yesterday…

  3. Keep it and give it to the next Big Issue seller you see, of course…

  4. Is there not a rubbish bin nearby, or is that a silly question ?

  5. Btw is your bike still the one that used o be mine? Or have you moved down market?

  6. I’ve noticed that – with stations still being bin-less around these parts (is the fear of people blowing them up _still_ that great?) that people do have problems when they have rubbish – they don’t want to litter, but they also don’t want to carry their rubbish around with them. I know, on the station, if I have to drop something – I try and put it up someplace so it is easy for the litter collectors who come along to pick it up.
    Saying that though, away from the paranoia of the stations, there are a fair few “industrial strength” bins around the town – the sort that double as bomb shelters should you find yourself in need…
    I’d be tempted to place it neatly on the floor so that the litter collectors could collect it on their next circuit of the area.
    Of course, you can’t put “This is not a bin” sign on the bike or anything like that – you’d get back and find it in less than perfect condition when you returned – bits missing – tires deflated – etc

  7. I’m a complete tosser.
    As it were.
    No, I’m trying to make myself sounds reckless and sexy. I’m actually one of these people that’ll walk 11 miles to dispose of someone else’s litter, and puts overturned rubbish bins upright again, and so on.
    I always feel like I’m not doing myself any favours by doing so. But that’s not the point, I suppose.

  8. Brennig – what, the bike? It’s not that bad.

    Flighty – apparently yes, and it’s bike shaped.

    Huttonian – it’s the same one but you have to remember it’s more than 20 years old now, so probably about 87 in bike years.

  9. Mike – I’ll walk miles to dispose of my own litter but not that of other people. You’ve got to draw the line somewhere. Not sure where I stand on overturned litter bins though. Here the street bins screw into the ground, so it’s a bit of a task either righting them or tipping them over in the first place

  10. Mas – you’re right – sarcasm won’t get you anywhere (sorry, Akismet decided your comment was spam for some reason). But whoever it was who ate the sandwich was perfectly happy to carry it around before they started eating it – why can’t they hang on to the wrapper when they’ve finished it?

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