This Page Intentionally Left Blank

What is the point – oh SouthWest Trains – of putting up ‘Due to a fault no information can be displayed’ on your information boards? I suppose that way we know you’re not wilfully withholding it from us. Although sometimes I wonder. There was some sort of signalling-related gridlock going on this morning and at one point we had two out-of-service trains, one on platform three and one on platform four, both held at a red signal, and the only announcement we got was a slightly frantic one urging us to stand well back behind the yellow lines. Whether that was because they were about to explode, or whether they just didn’t want our grubby fingerprints on their shiny new trains was never explained. Anyway, when the guy finally came on the tannoy and was just about to tell us where the next train would be going he was cut off abruptly with nothing but a faint gurgle, and the rest was silence. No doubt the SWT gestapo tracked him down in his secret location and put a stop to his broadcasting of classified train destination information to the hoi polloi.

‘For you, station-master, ze war is over …’


5 responses to “This Page Intentionally Left Blank

  1. Aaah… Good to see at least one thing hasn’t changed yet since I left London. Now that I’m back, might have to go on a trip on SWT. even if it’s just for memory’s sake!

  2. LOL – I now have visions of SWT deliberately blowing up their trains to stop mere commuters making them grubby while the old rolling stock is used to transport dissident staff members to ‘holding camps’.

  3. Model – This was clearly the new era SWT had in mind – you can’t say they didn’t warn us

    Caatje – indeed, nothing at all has changed

  4. Your blog makes me laugh out loud – thankyou!

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