So just what are the penalties for drink-cycling, anyway? I ask only because someone – not me, obviously, but a friend – might have been at their work Christmas dinner and they might have thought it was a bit of a faff to get the train all the way into Waterloo and walk home instead of getting off at Vauxhall as usual and cycling back on their bike seeing as how it was there all waiting for them and the roads are quiet at this time of night anyway. And this someone might have heard that if you’re caught pedalling under the influence that you get points taken off your licence. And they might have thought ‘sod it, what are they going to do, disqualify me? And then what will I do then, cycle everywhere?’ and just cycled home anyway. Not that I condone that sort of thing, obviously. Not at all.
Still, the roads are lovely and quiet at this time of night, aren’t they? Apparently.