What if They Held a Strike and Nobody Came?

So I sat on the platform at Vauxhall today reading all about the strike and the supposed chaos facing commuters and wondering where, exactly, all this disruption had got to. Admittedly my train was showing running a minute late but that was hardly going to form a death blow thrust into the very heart of the forces of capitalism, especially as it managed to make up the time again between Putney and Kew Bridge. And it wasn’t just me – in the spirit of this blog’s deep commitment to wasting time at work – sorry that should read in-depth research – I checked the SouthWest trains online departure boards for Waterloo and Vauxhall and couldn’t see so much as a single delay, let alone cancellations, disruption, wailing, gnashing of teeth or similar. According to the SouthWest Trains site, the dispute did go ahead, but they ran a normal service anyway. Which makes you wonder who was driving the trains. One scary answer would be nobody and the trains were just wandering back and forth along the rails of Southern England through sheer force of habit. But the really scary answer would be that they’d brought the managers in to drive the trains instead …

Any sightings of either disruption, driverless trains or a hapless personnel manager sitting in a cab wondering which button to press next gratefully received … meanwhile I’ll have a few more strikes like that, please.*

* yes, yes, I know, famous last words …

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