There’s No Such Thing as a Free Pig

It has recently come to my attention that on Wednesday, commuters in the trendy Zone 1 tube stations were getting handouts of strangely demonic looking pigs on their way to work. Not only that but, reading between the lines, they regularly get free stuff given to them by people promoting things – even the other half used to get the odd free copy of the Guardian when they were promoting their new size.

Until I heard this, I probably wouldn’t have given house room (or even desk room) to a bizarre pink plastic pig, but now I’m jealous. In all my years of commuting I have been given precisely nothing on my way to work. Nada. Zilch. Square root of bugger all (unless you count colds, flu, high blood pressure and the occasionaly grudging discount on my next season ticket). But then I don’t work in zone 1 and that means my season tickets costs me 14 quid a week, instead of the �26 you pay for zones 1-3. Now there may be other advantages to having a zone 1 season ticket (particularly if you actually work in zone 1) but I think that’s a lot of money to pay just on the off chance of some PR floozy handing you the odd desk toy. And besides, when I stepped out of work on Wednesday I may not have been handed a pig, but I did catch a flash of turquoise and turned round in time to see a kingfisher darting off into the bushes. You don’t get many of those in zone one, now, do you?

Still wouldn’t say no to a free pig, though


9 responses to “There’s No Such Thing as a Free Pig

  1. Lucky you seeing a kingfisher!
    I hope that you’re feeling better and have a good weekend.

  2. I’m impressed, kingfisher in London (although I would expect one in your neck of the woods if anywhere ..)

  3. Those damned pigs are everyhwere. They’re supposed to be stress-busting squeezy things, but a former colleague of mine ripped the head off her pig in rage. It got rid of her stress though, but only works the once.

  4. They’d only have to innocently give give one to a militant Muslim commuter and we’ll end up with a protest in Trafalgar Square and pink squeezy pigs being burned on the streets of France. Mmmmmmmmm……..bacon.

  5. Worcesterpark – there have been protests in Trafalgar square for the last 3 weekends in a row … I wondered what it was about. Disgruntled muslims, or maybe disgruntled zone 3-ites.
    Flighty & Claire – you’d be surprised what I see out of my office window. But no pigs, not even flying ones

  6. This isn’t related to the pig, I just read this on and it reminded me of some of the things I’ve read on your blog. I hope you will find it amusing, since you don’t have
    to experience the aggravation of living through it…or at least find some comfort in the fact that transportation incompetence isn’t limited to your small corner of the world.
    Conductor: Local, this is a 7 local. 33rd Street next.
    Loudspeaker: Attention Flushing-bound 7 train. You are not a local. You are an express train. Your next stop is 61st-Woodside. Now let the people in and close your doors.
    –Queensboro Plaza 7 station

  7. Rebecca – ha! Brilliant … almost worth being trapped on the wrong train for …

  8. I’m one of the lucky drowning in an avalanche of free crap. In the past month I have gotten 1 of those demonic pigs, an offensively orange umbrella, a tacky lime green insulated lunch bag with samples of a new fangled soya drink that contains far more sugar than one should consume in a week, and a free first class ticket to Manchester from Virgin. Why would I want to go to Manchester when I already have to cross zones?

  9. but a first class rail ticket to Manchester is worth actual money … oh no, hang on, you said Virgin … And besides, was it a return, or would you be stuck in Manchester for ever?

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