How to Wear a Scarf

I was pleased to note this evening that with the return of the cold weather passengers had mostly reverted to wearing their scarves in the normal sensible way, i.e. wrapped around the neck one or two times, rather than the new poncey doubled-up way with the ends tucked through the loop. Up until now this strange continental variation on normal scarf-wearing practice had become so prevalent that I was beginning to wonder whether some sort of EU regulation had made it compulsory and I had unaccountably missed the memo.

The purpose of a scarf, you see, is to keep the wearer’s neck warm, not to make them look as though they were the victim of a failed knitwear-related hanging. Far be it from me to dispense fashion advice, but next time you are about to don your woolly muffler, before deciding how to wear it, you should look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself the following simple question:

‘Am I, in any way, French?’

If the answer is yes, feel free to do the slip-knot thing. You’ll probably be doing it with a cashmere scarf teamed with an understated yet beautifully cut camel overcoat and the end result will be insouciant yet casually elegant. In all other cases, especially if the scarf in question was knitted for you by a relative who still remembers the Tom Baker Doctor Who years, stick with the usual way. You know it makes sense.

(Next week on Disgruntled Commuter your fashion advice guru will be tackling the following thorny issues: Wearing a Hat – head or heels? Socks – one on each foot? and Donning Underwear – label at the back?)

PS: sorry for the late posting. There was no internet at home all evening; we had to make our own entertainment (apparently there’s this thing called television …). I wrote this last night, honest, but I had to bring it into work on a memory stick. Technology, who needs it…


9 responses to “How to Wear a Scarf

  1. Tag! You have to answer the questions now. See my homepage.

  2. Do the powers-that-be know you have blogged from work? Or are you the powers-that-be?

  3. Phew ! I’m a once round the neck man myself.

  4. The so-called ‘powers-that-be’ have been in a meeting all day, and in any case I think they are far too important, certainly more so than us plebs, to be spending time reading blogs. The one I know is too busy flogging stuff on eBay!

  5. James & Huttonian – shhh! Nobody tell the powers-that-be.
    Flighty – thought you might be
    WorcesterPark – aargh, tagged … these are difficult and complicated questions. Will have to cogitate on my response

  6. Well, I must admit, I’m a “make a loop and stick 2 ends through it” kinda girl.
    For 1 reason only : If I tie it round normal way, however loose, I feel like I am being strangled, I get very hot and start panicking. With the loop thing, it keeps the neck warm but I can do it looser with less pressure mentally on my neck,
    So please, spare a thought for us mere mortals who do not do this out of fashion sense (no way in hell am I french) but who do it out of sheer necessity. I think you’d rather have me tie it this way than holding up a train because I fainted….

  7. Caatje – true and you’re a bit foreign (albeit not French) so we’ll cut you some slack. Literally in your case.

  8. in my case (the blogging from work bit ) i went in and said “my computers died you’ll find me going to the odd site i don’t normally.” and did (but only to check email, honest guv!)

  9. I think posting is fair game from work, once in a while. The composition (which takes me at least half an hour per entry, not that you’d know it …) and resulting dribbling around reading other blogs, commenting, checking stats etc etc is a bit more of a time waster and I try and avoid doing that.

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